VANITY FAIR HAS A MAN CRUSH ON JOHNNY DEPP.

4 times in 4 years?

VF (aka the JDFC) really do love him.

Or, more t the point, the readers of VF must really love him, because a certain spike in circulation can be the only reason to put him on their cover as often as they do. No actor, no matter how attractive, handsome or unhygenic, is so interesting that each publicist-approved cover story is that compelling.

Unless of course, they work with Angelina Jolie.

Then, of course, every tabloidy editor in the world holds their breath and secretly (and wickedly) hopes for firework-y shenanigans of the Mr and Mrs Smith/”Poor Jennifer” variety – of the kind that made Angelina so interesting to begin with.

The media, after all, had been fueling any potential micro embers, with unconfirmed reports of Vanessa Paradis issuing bans and restrictions on the scenes Depp and Jolie were allowed to film on their new film, The Tourist, which opens in the US on the 10th.

Surely there was something spicy to be said?

No such luck.

As tactful as he is attractive, here’s the quote: ““Meeting her and getting to know her was a real pleasant surprise. You don’t know what she might be like—if she has any sense of humor at all. I was so pleased to find that she is incredibly normal, and has a wonderfully kind of dark, perverse sense of humor…Poor thing, dogged by paparazzi, her and her husband, Brad…all their kids.”

She “normal!” She has kids! Could content for interviews get less controversial than that?

How about throwing some Grannies into the mix?

“I’ve had the honor and the pleasure and gift of having known Elizabeth Taylor for a number of years,” he says. “You know, you sit down with her, she slings hash, she sits there and cusses like a sailor, and she’s hilarious. Angie’s got the same kind of thing, you know, the same approach.”

You’ve got to give it to him. He’s not just a pretty face.

Via Coverawards