The worst thing anyone ever did to me at a funeral was ask me if I could organise an internship for their grand daughter.
At Fair Lady.
But one of my girlfriends has a more stomach-churning story.
She slipped her business card to a handsome, allegedly single man, at the graveside.
“Why not?” she said, when I suggested, gently, that it might not be the most tasteful place to indulge in a bit of single-man scouting. “Hitting on someone is very life-affirming, isn’t it? And, when you are at a funeral, you are reminded, more than ever, that time waits for no woman.”
It is not cool to think frivolous, or frisky thoughts around grief.
But, oh Lordy, sorry and all that, but I can’t help myself.
I’ll take this post off immediately if anyone is offended, but, check this out:
Here is poor DB, mourning his beloved Grandfather, Joe West, at his funeral, yesterday.
He does look very heart-broken and also …he looks quite handsome in a yarmulka.
His grandfather (RIP etc) is being laid to rest in the Jewish cemetary, could that mean ….that David Beckham is a little bit ….Jewish?
How can that be?!
But it would be excellent news for The Tribe’s gene pool.
If he is Jewish he is an abberation.
We are not known for either our breathtaking good looks, or our sporting prowess.
If Beckhamovitzky is 1/4 Jewish, that makes those boys (3 of them!) what, one eighth Jewish?
That’s good enough for my grandfather (RIP etc)
…and I have an age-appropriate daughter.
I can orgainse a shiddach!**
** A Jewish arranged hook-up. We are genetically programmed to do it, so none of the above is actually my fault. I can’t help it.